Love, Loss, Grief, Wisdom & Living Happy
In the month of love, grief came for a visit. An uncle’s passing triggered deeper grief with the coming anniversary of my mom’s death five years ago. In the quiet presence of loss, I felt grateful that this month’s Tea with Phi has been about kindness.
In holding myself gingerly, I witnessed grief rolling through, affecting my mental acuity and creating emotional ripples. In writing these words, I am reminded of my teacher’s wisdom – that grief is present because I have loved. And why would I trade love to avoid grief? Such is the paradox that offers us richness in life.
As the waves of grief receded, I touched deeper levels of conditioning that have affected how I view myself and my place in the world. These conditionings, while no longer true at a conscious level, still had roots inside of me. In holding those insights with kindness, with journaling, with meditating, with prayer, with openness and with inner presence, I can rejoice in the wisdom gifted to me yesterday.
In watching this interview “Five Regrets of the Dying” with Marie Forleo and Bronnie Ware, https://youtu.be/9ke-rPsxIuA
, I connected with my mom and asked what she would say to me now. In meditation, her wisdom told me to do what makes me happy each and every day
. A mandate for happiness, if you will – every day! Yes, thank you mom.
Life is so unpredictable. And it comes with its own challenges. Why would I make it harder for myself by trudging through each precious day, each gifted moment fighting, resisting, struggling, analyzing, playing it safe? Wouldn’t it be more kind, more loving, more of an honor and a celebration for having this life if I woke up each morning and asked myself, “What would make me happy today?” and honor that insight by living it? In doing so, I believe my heart would sing and rejoice, my soul would be soothed and comforted, and I’d be able to take care of my other details with more grace, more willingness, more presence, more happiness.
I accept the gift my mom has given me, to wake up each day with this important question, “What makes me happy today?” and to live it in honor of love, of loss, of life. Will you join me?